My name is Kristina, and I’m a Wedding Planner. In my role as a Wedding Planner, I wear many, many hats. I can be a relationship counsellor, a life coach, a friend, an organizer, a firefighter, an accountant, a seamstress or a shoulder to cry on, just to name a few. Every wedding and every couple is completely different and unique, which keeps my job refreshing and new every single day. But there’s one trend, and one phrase in particular, that I see almost daily, and I can’t stand it. You’ve all heard it, and chances are you’ve said it: “Sweating for the wedding.”
Society has conditioned us to think that we shouldn’t love our bodies for how they are, that we need to be thin to be the “perfect bride”, in order to feel beautiful on our wedding days, and every day really. And I, sitting here, am not immune to feelings of inadequacy or negative self image, but I do try to make a conscious effort to not treat my body with hatred, but instead love and nourishment. I don’t think anyone is immune to it, no matter how much confidence they may exude.
Here’s my beef: “Sweating for the wedding” implies that you need to be “thin” or “fit” to be getting married. It implies that you aren’t good enough as you are, that there’s some standard you need to achieve. That you weren’t good enough when you got engaged and you need to lose weight before you’re allowed to get married. This simply isn’t true! I get it, it’s catchy, it rhymes, it’s marketable! It’s easy to get sucked into it - but please don’t. Your worth is not based on your size, the size of your pants, and certainly not the size of your wedding dress. Men and women come in all shapes and sizes, and as such, so do brides and grooms. And there is nothing wrong with any of those sizes!
Now, I’m not saying not to exercise and eat properly - quite the opposite. If you can’t love yourself enough to treat your body with respect, then do it for the one you’re marrying. Sweat for love, so that you can have a long and healthy life with the person you’re committing yourself to, for your eventual (maybe) kids, your friends, your family, and even your pets. Don’t sweat for the wedding - because as much as we hate to admit it, your wedding day will come and go, but sweat for your loved ones, so that you can be there for them, so that you can enjoy their company for as long as physically possible. The bottom line is, you’re worthy of love just as you are, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Your wedding day should be a day that you feel so special, but please don’t let yourself be tricked into thinking you need to meet someone else’s expectations or standards in order to be special! Your day is yours and your partner’s, and no one else’s, so you do you babe, and don’t look back.